Colin Montgomerie is fighting so many battles these days — to get back into the world’s top 50; to make the Europe Ryder Cup team; to restore pride to Scottish golf — that his opening round of 69 in the Barclays Scottish Open at Loch Lomond yesterday was what the locals round here, in their faintly damning way, would have called “fair enough”.

Counting the strokes, though, has never been the point of watching Montgomerie play golf. On the contrary, if you are part of the gallery following the great man for 18 holes, it is all about not getting in his way, not treading on his toes, and most especially — and, alas, some of us failed in this yesterday — not nattering or sniggering in ways that would put him off.

Much as most of us like this big man, there is a well-established game among the press corps that might loosely be termed Watching Monty Bark At People. The rules are skewed unfairly against him and always in favour of us, in as much as tournaments require a great reserve of intense concentration, which inevitably leads to a golfer getting brassed-off by some disturbance or other. In Montgomerie’s case, these moments are ten-a-penny.

“Haow!” he hollered yesterday from a green towards a BBC sound-man some 70 yards back up the fairway, who was busy pacing out the distance of a drive by Ángel Cabrera, who was booming along in the group behind. Seconds later, Monty fluffed his 4ft birdie putt and, inevitably, squinted back up the fairway at the felon who had put him off.

A few minutes earlier there had been a gaggle — your humble correspondent among them — flagrantly flouting the rules of the European Tour by meandering down the centre of the fairway instead of sticking to the ropes by the side. It was a temporary lapse in protocol that Montgomerie, having just spewed his drive into rough, was having none of.

“Bit too many people there on the fairway, lads,” he piped up, which could be taken as an instant admonition and, as such, would earn you maybe three points in Watching Monty Bark At People. These moments, though, only make you feel more grateful for his presence, for let’s face it, how dull the sport would have been, and how more impoverished the European Tour these past 15 years, without him.

It is such episodes that led to the pompous and somewhat self-righteous outburst by Ewen Murray, the Sky commentator, who this week castigated the player for a recent on-course misdemeanour. Murray said that Montgomerie had “let down the European Tour, his family, his friends, admirers, fans, sponsors and fellow professionals” in what the broadcaster went on to describe as “the most embarrassing few minutes I have ever witnessed on a golf course”.

In case you are under the impression Montgomerie had started shouting obscenities at spectators, or had pulled out a musket and blown a flock of pigeons to smithereens, the root of this Papal edict from Murray was another Monty ten-a-penny moment — over the duration of five seconds at the European Open last week he had snapped at a television technician. This was the bold, bedevilled, barking Montgomerie of old, but come on, was it really such a crime?

The Scottish galleries here at Loch Lomond partly provide the answer to that. They like Montgomerie, sometimes in spite of himself, and are prepared to forgive his occasional, intemperate ways. Why? Because the Scots love golf, and Montgomerie has been one of Europe’s finest over two decades, and they are more than happy to come back and cheer him on.

Apart from the perennial midge attacks — they are becoming a staple around Loch Lomond, these copious pests — the most audible groan of the day from the galleries was caused by Montgomerie bogeying the par three 8th hole — a hole he played 18 times in one day at his recent marriage at this venue.

“Weird, just crazy,” Monty said later, rubbing his curly mop. “I played that hole 18 times on my wedding without bogeying it once, and then I three-putt it today. There was almost too much pressure on me to make the par. Crazy.

“Though 69 is not a very good start, it is safe. A 69 around here is never a bad score, so I’ll take.”

We’ll come back today for more. They always do when this fellow is around.