10) Luke Young (down)

It turned out that Young retired from international football some time ago, but this was only discovered when Fabio Capello attempted to change his mind after Glen Johnson withdrew from the England squad. What is more disturbing - that Young was ever in the international reckoning, or that England are so threadbare in a World Cup year that he still might be?

9) His Highness Sheikh Mansour Bin Zayed Al Nahyan (up)

It would help anyone's fading self-confidence to receive the resounding vote of confidence in one's personal project that the Manchester City owner got when the team arrived in Abu Dhabi for a friendly against the United Arab Emirates. "It's our team playing against us," a number of locals repeated joyfully to the cameras of Sky Sports, proving that the Sheikh's people buy into the City dream completely. As it turned out, "our team" were faultless guests, allowing "us" to win 1-0 thanks to a penalty kick gifted by Stuart Taylor. Or perhaps Mark Hughes wanted to give the locals a true taste of the Premier League, ie, City being unable to get results away from the City of Manchester Stadium.

8) Dinara Safina (down) and Marat Safin (out)

Safin retired this week leaving behind memories of "splintered rackets and colourful outbursts" and having won two grand-slam titles, in Australia in 2005 and New York in 2000. His little sister, Dinara, is still going, but is ending one of those years that gives ranking systems a bad name. Defeat in the Australian and French Open finals, a semi-final exit at Wimbledon and in the third round in the US Open gave her a not-entirely-undeserved record as a big-match choker. Yet she spent most of the year as the world No 1, until justice was done and she was knocked down by Serena Williams to second place - a ranking that suits her permanent bridesmaid status.

7) David Davies (up)

The former FA front man chaired the panel that recommended that the so-called Crown Jewels of sporting events that should be available free to the widest possible audience should include The Ashes and England, Wales, Scotland and Northern Ireland home and away qualifiers for the World Cup and European Championships, and Wales Six Nations rugby matches (in Wales). Events dropped from the list are the Winter Olympics, the Derby and the Rugby League Challenge Cup final. So lots of love from the valleys for the man who was once personally assisted by Faria Alam, but not so much from the ski slopes or the land of Rhinos, Bulls and Dragons.

6) Gustavo Poyet (up)

After working as assistant to Dennis Wise and Juande Ramos, the garrulous Uruguayan is striking out on his own, accepting the offer of his first solo management job from Tony Bloom, Brighton & Hove Albion's extremely wealthy poker-playing owner. He follows a series of former Chelsea team-mates into management - as well as Wise, there's Mark Hughes, Gianfranco Zola, Roberto Di Matteo, Gianluca Vialli, Didier Deschamps and Dan Petrescu. West Ham United produced a legendary crop of managers, who used to share ideas at the Green Street Cafe over a full English after training. Somehow we imagine that the Chelsea brains trust preferred a farfalle ai funghi with a dry white ...

5) Mike Tyson (up)

The former heavyweight boxing champion, 43, was arrested after a brawl with a "celebrity photographer" at Los Angeles International Airport. The paparazzo told police that Tyson struck him once, inflicting a cut to the man's forehead. The photographer is reported to have struck Tyson first in an attempt to provoke him. How the mighty has fallen. We can't decide what is more depressing - that Tyson allowed an opponent to get in the first blow, or that his retaliatory punch didn't poleaxe the man. As Muhammad Ali once said of George Foreman, "Is that all you got?"

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