Someone in Wimbledon's high command must have made a mistake. At one end of No1 Court was petite Stéphanie Foretz, all 5ft 4in of her, wearing an unassuming little frock that she could have picked up in the sales at John Lewis and equipped with a tennis racket. At the other end was the Ice Queen, a six-foot blonde goddess in a designer jacket and, as far as we could tell, somewhat unfairly equipped with a rocket launcher.

Maria Sharapova did not so much start her Wimbledon campaign yesterday as make her entrance. The crowd got to their feet as soon as she set foot on the lush turf, but actually they were straining only to see the designer jacket and shorts that all the fuss was about. In the event, the “tuxedo” jacket that the fashionistas have been slavering over was really what we non-experts would describe as, er, a white jacket and the shorts ... well, on Eric Morecambe they would have been funny but with Sharapova's long, lean legs, it really doesn't matter.

It was an unfair match from the start as poor Foretz, from France, almost disappeared in the mêlée, looking for all the world like the dinner guest who turns up in T-shirt and jeans only to discover everybody else in evening gowns. And so it was when the tennis started: Sharapova all booming serves and massive forehands and Foretz looking as though she was dodging bullets.

Sharapova confessed that she had only one goal and that was to get the first round over with. She has not bothered this year with all the preamble of a warm-up tournament on grass, deciding simply to get on with it. “I just wanted to do the job as fast as I could,” she said.

So she did, in straight sets, 6-1, 6-4. The first set lasted only 27 minutes, then Sharapova shot off at high speed in the second, rushing to a 3-1 lead, but suddenly the elegant Russian seemed to take on a faraway look and the errors came thick and fast. Foretz could hardly believe her luck and started to get quite bold, crashing over the odd fizzer of a passing shot herself. What could be the matter be with Sharapova?

Perhaps it was all the worry over that jacket. After all, it is not easy being a fashion icon, you know. She revealed that yesterday's daring outfit was road-tested as long as seven months ago, just to make sure that it would not restrict her movement and would blend beautifully with Wimbledon's gorgeous backdrop. And - you might need to sit down to take in this revelation - she is already planning her outfit for 2009.

“Oh, I know what I will be wearing even in the fall [autumn] of 2009,” she revealed with some emphasis after the match. No wonder she failed to concentrate on the tennis.

But what will it be next year? We have had the pretty skirts and now the shorts. Could it be baggy pants and a string vest? Unfortunately, Sharapova says that it is for us to wonder and her to know - and nothing will be revealed until next year's Wimbledon.

The bigger question is whether Sharapova has not just the fashion but the game to win Wimbledon 2008. The jury is out on that one after a meaningless first-round match that was no more than a catwalk for the Russian.