Frankly, I blame the Reformation. Five hundred years ago, you could kick back
on some palm-fringed idyll, stirring only to slaughter the odd smiling
native before sipping piña coladas as the sun fell off the end of the earth,
and not once would your inner Calvin pipe up about salvation through labour
and the iniquity of poolside kips.
These days, however, the stain of self-improvement is everywhere. So, if
you’ve ever gazed into a cobalt lagoon, stared blankly at the cocktail menu
and wept with the vapid horror of it all, read on, as we round up the 20
best learning holidays on the planet.
CLIMBING, Mallorca
Sunny and dry, with limestone cliffs that act like superglue on the
fingertips, Mallorca is one of the best places in Europe to learn the
climbing ropes. Serac Outdoor Sports (0191 519 4495, www.seracoutdoorsports.co.uk)
has week-long courses for all abilities and ambitions, tackling anything
from Grade 3 single pitches (the owner, Andy Hedgecock, says his
five-year-old has managed worse) to 10-pitch, 900ft cliffs that plunge
vertically into the surf. Based in a villa with pool near medieval Pollensa,
the courses cost £699pp, full-board, including transfers, but not flights.
Airlines serving Palma include BMI Baby (0871 224 0224, www.bmibaby.com)
and EasyJet (www.easyjet.com).
INDIAN HEAD MASSAGE, Kent
With more than 70 acres of landscaped grounds, and views across the Weald of
Kent that act like VapoRub on stressed-out city chakras, the 14th-century
Oxon Hoath retreat (01732 811071, www.oxonhoath.co.uk)
has a programme of self-improvement classes that reads like a
hippie/Lutheran dream: Realise Your Inner Potential; Tantra, taught by Leora
Lightwoman; Egyptian Magical Intensive (sandals essential). Positively
mainstream by comparison, there’s also Top to Toe Bliss, teaching ayurvedic
and Indian head massage. Two nights start at £219pp, full-board, including
three classes or treatments and as much free love as you can squeeze in
between workshops.
PAINTING, Spain
The birthplace of Picasso and Velazquez, with a rugged, ancient landscape just
begging to be etched, Andalusia would inspire even the most pathetic
painter. Andalucian Adventures (01453 834137, www.andalucian-adventures.co.uk)
offers beginners’ courses in a variety of mediums, based at a family-run
hotel at the top of the whitewashed village of Zuheros, with brushtastic
views over a Moorish castle and the surrounding Subbetica Natural Park.
Seven nights cost £909pp, full-board with wine (no single supplement),
including five days’ tuition, equipment and transfers, but not flights.
Airlines serving Malaga include EasyJet (www.easyjet.co.uk),
Flybe (0871 522 6100, www.flybe.com) and
Monarch (0870 040 5040, www.flymonarch.com).
CREATIVE WRITING, Turkey
Perched atop a canyon above Kumlubuk Bay, with an infinity pool overlooking
the Lycian coast and a cricket-filled pine forest stretching up into the
hills, the Dionysos would locate the muse in even the most struggling
scribe. Off limits to children, it couldn’t be more writer-friendly if they
threw in publishing deals with your room bill. Exclusive Escapes (020 8605
3500, www.exclusiveescapes.co.uk)
has a sevennight course running from May 3 to 10, with daily tuition from
the writing coach Sara Bailey, for £1,000pp, half-board, including flights
with BMI to Dalaman, transfers and a gulet cruise.
RIDING, South Africa
It’s not every beginners’ riding holiday that lets you canter with giraffes
and zebras, or muster cattle, but then most don’t take place on a
20,000-acre wildlife reserve. Right in the rugged, parched heart of the
Limpopo region, bordering Botswana, Triple B Ranch has one of the finest
riding stables in South Africa. Trips are tailored to individual needs, from
short days allowing for swimming, tennis and G&Ts back at the colonial
lodge to hardcore saddle assaults with overnight wilderness safaris. Equine
Adventures (0845 130 6981, www.equineadventures.co.uk)
has nine nights from £1,885pp, including most meals, all drinks, tuition,
flights with South African Airways to Johannesburg and transfers.
MOUNTAIN-BIKING, Cumbria
Crisscrossing the Peak District National Park on bridleways, back lanes and
disused railway lines, this weekend course along the Tissington and High
Peaks trails covers everything from fixing your brakes to shifting your
balance as you go downhill. You’ll average a healthy 25 miles per day, with
90% off-road – the fireside pint overnight in Monyash will never have tasted
so good. One of 39 learning holidays on the Responsible Travel portal (www.responsibletravel.com
), the two-night trip is run by Saddle Skedaddle (0191 265 1110, www.skedaddle.co.uk)
and costs £195pp, B&B, including lunch, guides and tuition; bike
hire is £55. There are also beginners’ weekends in the Chilterns, the
Cotswolds and the Lake District.
TURNING JAPANESE
Kicking off with a training session at a sumo stable in Tokyo, this trip isn’t
so much hands-on as hold-on. Ready? After four days of sumo and aikido
lessons in Tokyo, it’s off to the Japanese alps to trek a part of the
Nakasendo Highway, making soba noodles at a cookery school en route,
before heading to Kyoto for a week of origami, pottery, cookery and
instruction in the art of the tea ceremony. Phew. The trip also crams in
visits to the 8th-century capital, Nara, as well as Okayama and the main
temples of Kyoto, so good luck finding time for your postcards. With Audley
(01993 838200, www.audleytravel.com),
14 nights start at £2,600pp, B&B, including flights from Heathrow
to Tokyo with British Airways and transfers.
TENNIS, Greece
Situated in 1,000 protected acres on the Kassandra peninsula, in northern
Greece’s spectacular Halkidiki province, Sani Resort is a promised land of
whipped cross-court backhands and double-fisted line drives, with eight
courts and a student-coach ratio that’s never more than 4:1. The
après-tennis isn’t bad, either, with everything from mountain-biking to
diving, Pilates to windsurfing. Seven nights in a junior suite at Porto Sani
Village start at £909pp, B&B, including 10 hours of tennis
coaching, BA flights and transfers, with ITC Classics (01244 355527, www.itcclassics.co.uk).
PARAGLIDING, France
Based in St Jean de Sixt, in the Haute Savoie, 20 miles as the paraglider
flies from where the sport began in Chamonix, this five-day course takes you
from absolute beginner to the point where you can launch solo, soaring on a
wing and a prayer, 3,500ft above the valley below. Mont Blanc as your
backdrop, the Aravis chain below, chairlifts back up the hill – you can
learn to paraglide in the UK, but, frankly, why would you? The Last Resort
(0800 652 3977, www.paraglidingholidays.com)
has five-day courses for £345pp; seven nights in a self-catering
apartment/chalet start at £165pp (catered from £420pp). Rail Europe (0844
848 4070, www.raileurope.co.uk)
has Eurostar/TGV returns from London to Annecy from £99. From there, it’s a
45-minute bus ride.
SALSA, Barcelona
Steamier than a Chinese laundry, Barcelona offers the ultimate salsa
quick-fix, with this weekend break packing in four hours of tuition just off
Las Ramblas, two escorted outings to the best salsa clubs in town, one salsa
session by the beach and cava tastings to unleash your inner Swayze. Dance
Holidays (0870 286 6000, www.danceholidays.com)
has two nights at a three-star hotel for £245pp, B&B, without
flights. EasyJet (www.easyjet.com) and
Clickair (00 800 2542 5247, www.clickair.com)
both serve Barcelona.
SWIMMING, Dorset
Using the Shaw method – an Alexander technique swimming stroke that minimises
stress on the neck and spine – this five-day course takes place at Bay View
Court, a three-star clifftop hotel in Bournemouth. Led by Caroline Swatton –
whose work with aquaphobes has earned her a European Woman of Achievement
award – the five-night course includes two hours of coaching per day and
costs £445pp, half-board. Swatton also runs beginners’ courses in Antigua: a
sevennight learn-to-swim package starts at £1,200pp, including self-catering
accommodation at the Jolly Beach resort, all activities, coaching, BA
flights and transfers. Both can be booked through Swalings (0870 710 1012, www.swalings.com).
SURFING, Lanzarote
Sandy of bottom, steady of swell, and so warm that, even in winter, the water
never dips below 20C, four-mile Famara beach, in northern Lanzarote, has the
best surfing this side of a rip curl in Maui. Surf South West (01271 890400, www.surfsouthwest.co.uk)
runs sevennight courses on Playa de Famara, using British Surfing
Association instructors; accommodation is in self-catering villas and
apartments in Famara village. Beginners get four hours’ tuition per day, and
prices start at £290pp, including lunch, equipment and transfers, but not
flights. Airlines serving Lanzarote include BA (0870 850 9850, www.ba.com)
and Monarch (0870 040 5040, www.flymonarch.com).
DIVING, Egypt
Five hours from the UK, with more than 400 species of coral, several hundred
types of fish and an array of shallow, current-free, good-visibility,
warm-water dive sites close to shore, the Red Sea – despite the crowds – is
still one of the best places in the scuba world to get your licence. Mantas,
morays, turtles and sharks – they’re all here, along with wrecks, wrasses
and smaller fish, in numbers so plentiful and colours so lurid, I was
screaming into my snorkel the first time I went. Regal Dive (01353 659999, www.regaldive.co.uk)
has seven nights at a five-star hotel in El Gouna from £690pp, B&B,
including a five-day Padi open-water course, equipment, flights with Thomas
Cook Airlines to Hurghada and transfers.
KITESURFING, Morocco
Original Travel (020 7978 7333, www.originaltravel.co.uk)
calls itself the “big short break” specialist, but this holiday isn’t so
much big as humungous. A Tardis of a five-night trip, it manages to pack in
three days of kitesurfing in the almost theme-park-photogenic Arab fishing
town of Essaouira and two nights in a stunning riad near the Djemaa
el Fna, in Marrakesh, with time aplenty for the souks. Prices start at
£867pp, B&B, including three nights at the Madada Mogador, in
Essaouira and two at Jardins de la Medina, in Marrakesh, as well as 10 hours
of tuition, equipment, BA flights to Marrakesh and transfers.
BECOME A WARRIOR, Kenya
Time was when the only Masai you met on safari were the ones serving G&Ts
and selling trinkets at the park gates. Now comes an extraordinary trip,
based at stunning, six-cottage Saruni Camp, on the edge of the northern
Masai Mara – a fast-track induction into warrior ways at the hands of the
local Moran. Tracking animals, seeking out medicinal plants, learning to use
a bow and arrow, tending goats, building your own bush camp – Bruce Parry
never had it so good. Discovery Initiatives (01285 643333, www.discoveryinitiatives.co.uk)
has seven nights, full-board, from £2,695pp, including drinks, activities,
BA flights via Nairobi and transfers. Part of the cost of your trip funds
the Koiyaki guide school.
SAILING, British Virgin Islands
Forming a smiling semicircle 200 miles west of Antigua, the British Virgin
Islands act like a buffer against the prevailing southeasterly swell,
creating one of the best beginners’ playgrounds on the planet. With the wind
at a manageable, dependable 15-25 knots, and notorious stopoffs including a
floating bar moored off Norman Island, the 50-odd islands offer sailing for
softies, with fabulous nightlife and snorkelling thrown in. Nonstop Sail
(01803 833399, www.nonstopsail.com)
has 14 nights, full-board, sailing from Antigua on a Dehler 47 (sleeps
nine), from £2,122pp, including flights with Virgin Atlantic, RYA skipper
and coaching and all transfers.
GOLFING, Mauritius
We had our doubts about letting this one in, and no, we’re not referring to
the environmental destruction, the prissy bourgeois etiquette or the check
slacks. It’s the game itself that troubled us: it’s tough enough when you
know how to play, but learning golf is death by a thousand divots. Which is
why we’ve plumped for Mauritius. Yes, you can pop down to your local club
instead, but staying in a five-star beach resort and spa with a private
bone-white beach isn’t half going to ease the pain of duck hooks and shanks.
Chaka Travel (028 9023 2112, www.chakatravel.com)
has seven nights at the Belle Mare Plage from £1,335pp, half-board,
including 10 hours of tuition with video analysis, green fees, transfers and
Virgin Atlantic flights.
COOKING, Thailand
Cookery courses are a baht a dozen in Thailand these days, but the Chiang Mai
school is one of the best, with a flair that’ll infect you faster than you
can say tom yum. Kumuka (0800 068 8855, www.kumuka.com)
offers it on the four-day Lemon Grass and Chillies trip (£120pp,half-board,
including three nights in a three-star hotel), which can be added to the
nine-day Thailand Explorer, a circular tour of northern Thailand from
Bangkok (£375pp, B&B), or the 22-day Timeless Mysteries, an
overland tour from Singapore to Bangkok (£1,155pp, B&B). Flights
are not included; ask the operator for details.
POLO, Argentina
Three hundred miles northwest of Buenos Aires, tucked in the central Sierras
like some conquistador’s palatial retreat, El Colibri is a Relais &
Châteaux estancia run by a couple who used to have a Michelin-starred
restaurant in Courchevel. The food is commensurately gorgeous, but it’s for
polo that El Colibri is really making its name. It draws the world’s best
players during competition season, with a 40-strong stable of ponies and top
coaches to match. The saddle-sore can enjoy yoga, golf, bird-watching,
cookery classes and trout-fishing, and you can even have a go at helping the
gauchos round up cattle. The Ultimate Travel Company (020 7386 4646, www.ultimatetravelcompany.co.uk)
has seven nights from £2,350pp, full-board, including daily polo lessons, BA
flights to Cordoba via Buenos Aires and transfers.
PHOTOGRAPHY, America
High up in northwest Wyoming, on a 7,000ft summit where the Rockies meet the
sky, Amangani is a Flintstone-chic sandstone palace overlooking Jackson
Valley, with vast picture-window views of the Teton range, so recognisable
from the work of Ansel Adams.
With two four-day workshops based at Amangani next year (February 24-29 and
September 28-October 3), the local photography god Tom Murphy will take
guests into the Grand Teton and Yellowstone national parks – mess up here
and you might as well toss your Canon into a geyser. Skitracer (0870 420
5782, www.skitracer.com) has seven
nights at Amangani for £2,875pp, B&B, including the photography
workshop and United Airlines flights to Jackson Hole via Washington and
Denver.
