The economy’s imploding, we can’t afford our mortgages and George Soros and
Mervyn King agree we’re all (to use a technical financial term) stuffed. But
will this make us all stay at home like poor church mice? Will it hell! We
want that break, we deserve that break and we’re damn well going to have it.
It’s just going to have to be cheap. Really, really cheap.
Just because you’re tightening your belt, however, doesn’t mean you have to
settle for a squalid caravan in Skegness. Here’s the proof.
HOME SWAPS
Why stay in an expensive hotel when you could be in a real home for (almost)
nothing? The world’s largest home-swap agency is HomeLink (www.homelink.org),
with more than 13,000 properties to choose from. It charges a fee of £115
for a year’s website listing and brochure entry: once you’ve paid up, you
can contact other owners direct and make the arrangements.
What you can get obviously depends on the home you have to offer – but it’s
location, not size, that counts. A one-bedroom flat in central London was
recently exchanged for a four-bedroom beachfront mansion in Vancouver.
Popular destinations for Brits include France (plenty in Paris), Spain, Italy
and Australia, but the agency now has homes as far afield as Japan, Oman and
even Vietnam. There are some tempting places: 124 in Tuscany, for instance,
many specifically requesting swaps with British owners, including restored
palazzo apartments in Florence and classic farmhouses deep in the Sienese
countryside.
Home Base Holidays (www.homebase-hols.com)
works on the same lines. It’s cheaper, at £29 for a year, and has 1,700
properties on its books.
If you like the States, consider California-based outfit HomeExchange.com: it
charges £50 and features more than 20,000 properties, half of them in
America.
CAMPING
The best camping – and the cheapest – isn’t in some rule-ridden holiday park,
the canvas equivalent of Butlins. It’s in a farmer’s field, with a water
tap, a shower block, gorgeous scenery and not much else.
The weather’s the thing. In the sunshine, camping is heaven, especially for
kids. In the cold and rain, it’s... not. So, the first tip is: be as
flexible as you can. Many seasoned campers don’t prebook, but simply wait
until the forecast looks good and then take off.
For first-timers, the biggest expense is the kit. If you can’t borrow a tent,
Millets (www.millets.co.uk) currently
has a cracking deal on a High Point starter pack – four-person tent,
sleeping bags (a double and two singles), two roll mats and a double air
bed, all for £90. A stove costs from £13; other essentials include a torch,
rugs, a mallet and a pot, pan and plate or two. Take your divan and pillows
too... makes a world of difference.
So, where to go? Two of our favourites are in Devon and Yorkshire. Cloud Farm (www.doonevalleyholidays.co.uk)
on Exmoor is a treat: the camping is in a delightful spot – three riverside
fields in a little valley. No booking, you just turn up; no formal pitches,
you go where you like, and campfires are allowed. Lots of space, too –
they’ve only had to turn away people once in five years. Per night, it’s
£7.50 for adults, £5.50 for 5-12s, under5s free.
Overlooking superb Robin Hood’s Bay, Hooks House Farm (www.hookshousefarm.co.uk)
has panoramic views, excellent walking and atmospheric Whitby nearby. It
takes bookings for a week or more (still plenty of room in the school hols)
or just roll up for shorter breaks; August weekends can get busy. Small and
family-run, it’s even cheaper: adults £4 per night, children £2.
COTTAGES
Going self-catering in the UK ought to be one of the cheapest holidays around,
but all too often it doesn’t end up like that. Look on the posh agency
websites and you’ll have trouble finding an August week at a decent
three-bedroom place in Cornwall for less than £1,500 – if you can find one
at all.
That’s with an agency, which charges the cottage owners anything up to 25%
commission on every booking taken, forcing them to keep rates high to make a
return. As a rule, cutting out the middleman will get you a much cheaper
deal.
So go to an advertising site, where independent owners pay a small flat fee.
Both www.cottagesdirect.com and www.independentcottages.co.uk
list hundreds of properties nationwide and include the owners’ websites and
phone numbers, so you can book direct.
There are some top deals to be had, too, even in the school summer holidays.
In Devon, Cottages Direct has Pipkin, a three-bedroom cottage (sleeps five)
in the cute, restored hamlet of Old Bridwell. It costs just £610 for the
week from August 16.
Sites like these don’t inspect the properties, so you’re taking the owner’s
word on what it’s like – but, even so, problems are rare. “I’ve worked with
tour operators and agencies for 25 years, and the volume of complaints for
booking direct is much lower,” says Peter Hunt of Cottages Direct.
If you need the reassurance of knowing your property has been inspected, it’s
worth looking at the tourist-board websites: www.enjoyengland.com,
www.visitscotland.com and www.visitwales.co.uk.
All of these have listings of the thousands of cottages that have been seen
and graded according to their own local schemes.
VILLAS ON THE MED
Just as with cottages, you can save by skipping the agencies and going direct.
A number of sites carry ads from villa owners – many of them British expats
or UK residents letting out their holiday homes. One of the best is www.holidaylets.net,
which has nearly 11,000 properties worldwide, including 1,600 in France
alone.
It has a good crop of (commission-free) bargains. From July 19 – just as the
school hols start – the Old French Bakery in Plaigne, deep in the Languedoc
countryside, is still available; it has a view across fields of sunflowers,
and plenty of character – the old oven is still there. It sleeps six and
costs only £440 for the week. Combine that with a cheap Ryanair (www.ryanair.com)
flight to Béziers – they’re currently about £80 return – and your week in
the sun is about £153 each.
Other good villa advertising sites to try include www.cheznous.com,
www.ownersdirect.co.uk and www.clickstay.com.
RETREATS
If the coming financial meltdown has made you stop and think about the godless
materialism of our society, how about a monastic retreat? Sure, it’s not
everyone’s idea of a holiday, but they’re often in beautiful locations,
they’re as peaceful as it gets and they cost... well, as much as you’re
prepared to give.
Throssel Hole Buddhist Abbey (www.throssel.org.uk)
runs weekend and full-week retreats. The routine’s pretty rigorous – 6am
starts, 10pm to bed and six meditation sessions a day, with vegetarian
meals. Lovely place to do it, though, in attractive stone buildings in a
wild corner of moorland in Northumbria, near Allendale. There’s no fee, but
you’re expected to make a donation.
Way up near Elgin in Morayshire, medieval Pluscarden Abbey (www.pluscardenabbey.org)
is occupied by Benedictine monks. The Highland countryside is uplifting in
itself, and the church is stunning, with superb stained-glass windows.
All guests are accommodated free of charge – a donation is welcomed but not
required. You’ll be expected to muck in, helping with the market garden and
beehives, and attendance at daily Mass is encouraged. Men have private rooms
in a wing of the abbey itself, women in a separate retreat building.
VINTAGE CARAVANS
Caravan parks packed with static vans are cheap but not that cheerful. For
something with a little more style, try Vintage Vacations (www.vintagevacations.co.uk)
on the Isle of Wight. Its collection of 10 classic American trailers, all
authentic interiors and glistening aluminium, lends a classy edge to
caravanning. It’s retro but comfy, with showers, fridges and complimentary
Babycham on arrival (how’s that for nostalgia?).
They are heavily booked in the school holidays, though there are midweek
breaks available in a small, four-berth 1962 Airstream Safari, from £185 for
two nights; weekly stays in larger trailers go from £410 in June, £470 in
September – not bad for four people.
HOSTELS
There’s been a lot of hype about hostelling going upmarket, but it pays to
choose with care: some British hostels are still cramped, grubby and
overstocked with drunken Dutch teenagers.
However, there’s been a genuine renaissance at the YHA (www.yha.org.uk)
– it’s investing £13m in upgrading its properties this year alone.
Broad Haven is a good example: spick, span and just refurbished, it’s in an
unbeatable position, 100yd from the broad sands and sparkling water of St
Bride’s Bay, Pembrokeshire – perfect for surfing, sea kayaking and
sandcastles. The food’s good and locally sourced, and there’s a bar. A
fourbed family room, with ensuite, costs from £65 a night.
For something that’s a little more evocative, go for Hartington Hall, a superb
17th-century manor house near Buxton, in the Peak District. Adults from £18
in a small dorm; fourbed family rooms are £71.
