BRING ON THE BLING
The Bar, The Dorchester, W1
The look: This intimate space has recently undergone a
baffling refurbishment. A red and gold colour scheme looks trashy, and the
huge red-glass stalagmites that pop up around the room are downright weird.
A celebration of bad taste worthy of Dame Edna. Funky ambient music.
Glass of champagne: £13.50, Louis Roederer.
Cocktails: About £12, try a mulito (rum, lime, mint and lulo
juice).
Free nibbles: Generous serving of nuts and crisps.
Perfect for: Entertaining your blingiest friends.
How’s the service? Impeccable.
Who goes there? Sir Philip Green; boob-job blondes.
What we think: Perfect service and delicious tipples are the
only signs that you are drinking in one of the world’s great hotels - the
aggressive, vulgar look of this bar doesn’t sit well with its pedigree, and
it does a disservice to its polished, top-class staff.
Rating: 7 out of 10.
Details: The Dorchester (020-7629 8888,
www.thedorchester.com), Park Lane, London W1.
WAITING IN VAIN
The May Fair Bar, Radisson Edwardian May Fair Hotel, W1
The look: Large and dimly lit. A lot of black marble and
black shiny surfaces make it feel more like a nightclub than a bar. Nobody
came to assist us or show us to a table. We found one and ordered, but after
a 20-minute wait our drinks had not arrived. We politely reminded one of the
waiters, which produced no apology or reassurance that they were on their
way. We left.
Glass of champagne: £9, Moët & Chandon.
Cocktails: £10.69 for a cosmopolitan.
Free nibbles: Pistachios.
Perfect for: Getting an evening off to a bad start.
How’s the service? What service?
Who goes there? Rowdy after-office crowds.
What we think: Try somewhere else.
Rating: 0 out of 10.
Details: Radisson Edwardian May Fair Hotel (020-7629 7777,
www.radissonedwardian.com), Stratton Street, London W1.
DUPED AT DUKES
The Bar, Dukes Hotel, SW1
The look: Clubby and conservative, with plain leather chairs,
small tables, antique oil paintings and blue Regency-stripe wallpaper.
Glass of champagne: £10.50, Ayala Cocktails: £14 for a
Martini.
Free nibbles: Generous bowl of nuts, olives and crackers.
How’s the service? Desultory and offhand. Dirty glasses
were collected and dumped on a table in the corner rather than whisked out
of sight. Dukes’s signature Martini was indeed good, but at £14 a pop,
served with a sneer, it needed to be.
Who goes there? Film stars, models, businessmen.
Perfect for: Negotiating your divorce.
What we think: An old-school bolt hole in St James’s, but
don’t expect a warm welcome. Let’s hope that Gordon Campbell Gray’s makeover
this year changes things.
Rating: 4 out of 10.
Details: Dukes Hotel (020-7491 4840, www.dukeshotel.com), St
James’s Place, London SW1.
KATE MOSS GLOSS
The Donovan Bar, Brown’s Hotel, W1
The look: An inviting, dimly lit bar adorned with Terence
Donovan’s photographs. Book ahead to reserve the cosy cubicle for a party of
eight.
Glass of champagne: £13, Taittinger.
Cocktails: Try a “Space Race” - Sputnik vodka, Cointreau,
lychee liqueur, cranberry and guava juice (£11.50).
Free nibbles: Warm canapés, such as monkfish wrapped in parma
ham and mini pizzas, handed round. Olives and nuts served with drinks.
How’s the service? Prompt.
Who goes there? Kate Moss, Alan Whicker, Al Gore, Clive Owen,
plus well-heeled locals.
Perfect for: A first date.
What we think: Stylish.
Rating: 8 out of 10.
Details: Brown’s Hotel (020-7493 6020,
www.roccofortehotels.com), Albemarle Street, London W1.
THE PLACE TO BBC
Artesian, Langham Hotel, W1
The look: The bar has a Chinese theme as well as two splendid
lamps shaped like horse heads. There are high ceilings, big chandeliers and
views across to Broadcasting House and All Souls Church. Elegant.
Glass of champagne: £12.50, Laurent-Perrier Brut NV.
Cocktails: Try a Brazilian Mule - rum, vanilla, lime and
ginger beer . . . very refreshing.
Free nibbles: Canapés from 6-8pm: prawns and parma ham on
crackers. Plus nuts and cheese sticks.
How’s the service? Attentive and full of suggestions
when choosing cocktails.
Who goes there? Simon Schama, BBC bigwigs from Broadcasting
House.
Perfect for: Celeb-spotting.
What we think: Stylish, but not ostentatious.
Rating: 9 out of 10.
Details: Artesian (020-7636 1000, www.langhamhotel
london.co.uk), 1C Portland Place, Regent Street, London, England, W1.
DON’T FEEL GUILTY
Gilt Champagne Lounge, Jumeirah Carlton, W1
The look: All that glisters is gold at the new Gilt Champagne
Lounge. The bar is in a small side room, with nooks and crannies for a tête
à tête. Ostentatious and sexy.
Glass of champagne: £14, Pommerie Brut.
Cocktails: £17.50 for a Bellini.
Free nibbles: Nuts and olives; sushi from 6.30pm to 8.30pm.
How’s the service? Fast and friendly.
Who goes there? Martine McCutcheon, Alan Whicker.
Perfect for: Glamming it up.
What we think: Not many know about Gilt yet - great place for
a date.
Rating: 7 out of 10.
Details: Jumeirah Carlton (020-7858 7250,
www.jumeirahcarltontower.com), Cadogan Place, London SW1.
NAMES ARE THE GAME
The Met Bar, The Metropolitan Hotel, W1
The look: Defiantly red in its colour scheme, the Met is
still a busy, hip hangout, but its hard lines, uncomfortable seating and
rather uneasy atmosphere date it. But then, it is ten years old and,
notwithstanding a makeover, hasn’t caught up with today’s chilled vibe,
where cool must always be comfortable. Only guests and members can visit the
Met Bar -which still makes it an exclusive drinking hole.
Glass of champagne: £7.50, François Hemart Gran Cru Rosé.
Cocktails: £10.50 for a mojito.
Free nibbles: Wasabi peas and olives.
How’s the service? Good-looking, efficient, bar staff
dressed in black Armani.
Who goes there? Cameron Diaz, Boris Becker, the Black Eyed
Peas, Arctic Monkeys.
Perfect for: Feeling like a rock star.
What we think: Poptastic, if that’s your sort of thing.
Mildly stressful, if it isn’t. But if you’re paying top rates for a room
here (which start at £429) why not try mixing with the rock crowd?
Rating: 6 out of 10. Details: The Metropolitan (020-7447
1000, www.metropolitan.co.uk), Old Park Lane, London W1.
TRENDY IN HOXTON
The Hoxton Grille, The Hoxton Urban Lodge, EC2
The look: Exposed air-conditioning vents, brick walls and a
long US diner-style bar give the Hoxton Grille a distinctly West Side of
Manhattan feel — you might be in a drinking hole in the hip Meatpackers’
district of New York. There’s an inner courtyard with small tables set
around an olive tree. Popular with arty types. Glass of champagne: £7,
Pommerie Brut. Cocktails: £6 for a blueberry Margarita.
Free nibbles: None.
How’s the service? Rather slow.
Who goes there? Callum Best, Keane, the Arctic Monkeys.
Perfect for: A lively drink after work.
What we think: Lots of fun, and full of energy - and rooms
are about £100 if you want to stay and crash out.
Rating: 7 out of 10.
Details: The Hoxton Urban Lodge (020-7550 1000,
www.hoxtonhotels.com), 81 Great Eastern Street, London EC2.
AMERICAN FRIEND
The Library Bar, The Lanesborough
The look: Clubby, extremely comfortable, and traditional with
a heavy dose of showy American opulence - dramatic curtains, touches of
gilt, lavish flower displays. You need to be on your best behaviour here:
the bar’s elegant white-jacketed waiters are professional, polite and aloof,
and glide around the room, trays aloft, like ice skaters - even the more
portly ones. There’s nothing remotely trendy or left-field about this place.
Your aunt would like it. And so will you.
Glass of champagne: £13, Taittinger.
Cocktails: £13.50 for a bullet-through-the-brain classic
Martini.
Free nibbles: Ample serving of nuts and vegetable crisps.
How’s the service? Smooth as silk.
Who goes there? Madonna, Jay-Z and Beyoncé have all been
spotted here.
Perfect for? A celebration; an evening with a special friend.
What we think: Glamorous and civilised (the two rarely go
together these days). Worth every penny.
Rating: 9 out of 10.
Details: The Lanesborough, Hyde Park Corner, London SW1X
(020-7259 5599).
A BAR TO BEAT A CAR
Refuel, The Soho Hotel, W1
The look: Refuel is a vast improvement on its former life as
an NCP car park. A super-long shiny bar, a colourful, jazzy mural and crowds
of thin, chattering, flirting media luvvies make this place feel a lot
glossier than most watering holes in loveable but louche Soho. The staff are
busy, but work frenetically hard, so you won’t be left waiting long for your
drink. It’s a big space, with tables and seats, but it gets very crowded.
Glass of champagne: £9.50, Beaumont des Crayères.
Cocktails: £9.50 for a Soho Passion/Over the Top.
Free nibbles: crisps.
How’s the service: Busy but switched on.
Who goes there? Charles Dance, Natalie Portman, Dennis
Hopper, P. Diddy. Heaving with film and TV execs.
Perfect for: Giving soundbite interviews about your leading
role in the new Tarantino movie; that flirty second date.
What we think: One day, all car parks will be like this.
Noisy, fast, fun — and great for people-watching.
Rating: 7 out of 10 Details: The Soho Hotel, 4 Richmond Mews
London W1 (020-7559 3000, www.firmdale.com)
ONE FOR THE SPRING
Roof Garden, The Trafalgar, SW1
The look: This open-air rooftop bar is dressed like an Iberian
chill-out lounge — white leather sofas, white paintwork, olive trees in
white pots, helped along by ambient sounds and lite soul. White bar stools
lining the roof edge give spectacular bird’s eye views over Trafalgar Square
— you’re practically face to face with Lord Nelson. It’s open May-September,
though they are considering putting a marquee-style roof on the top to keep
it open round the year.
Glass of champers: £9.50, Piper-Heidseck.
Cocktails: Not available.
Nibbles: No free ones, but there is menu of light bites, such
as vegetable antipasti (£5).
Perfect for: A blind date — the amazing view will ensure all
pregnant pauses are filled.
How’s the service? Relaxed and thoughtful. Blankets
were handed out to women who felt chilly as the evening wore on.
Who goes there? A hotchpotch of upwardly mobile chavs and
trendy thirtysomethings.
What we think: The Roof Garden isn’t big on sophistication,
but it’s cheerful and laid-back — and with a view like this, who needs
anything more?
Rating: 8 out of 10.
Details: Roof Garden, The Trafalgar (020-7870 2900,
www.thetrafalgar.com), 2 Spring Gardens, Trafalgar Square, London SW1.
IT’S A GEM
Mirror Bar, the Landmark, NW1
The look: Snazzy, upmarket, plush, plenty of cosy corners — and lots
and lots of mirrors. The colour scheme is rich, with reds, purples and golds
— no minimalist nonsense here. Feels a bit like drinking in a jewellery box.
Glass of champers? £15, Tattinger.
Cocktails: From £12.50 for a cosmopolitan.
Free nibbles: Japanese crackers, plus canapés from 5.30pm to
7pm each night.
How’s the service? Excellent. Staff are attentive,
speedy and polite.
Who goes there? Liam and Noel Gallagher of Oasis.
Perfect for: An after work pick-me-up or a discreet chat.
What we think: Tables are far enough apart to have private
conversations and it doesn’t get too busy. A good choice of champagnes and
wine.
Rating: 8 out of 10.
Details: The Landmark (020-7631 8000,
www.landmarklondon.co.uk), 222 Marylebone Road, London NW1.
FLYING HIGH
Galvin at Windows, London Hilton on Park Lane, W1
The look: Executive airport lounge — very beige, very
Seventies — with an untidy seating plan. Comfortable and jolly, but rather
uninspiring — has a businesslike air. A guitarist played forgettable,
inoffensive music.
Glass of champers: £12.75, Pommery Brut Royal.
Cocktails? Bellinis are £12.95.
Free nibbles: Crisps.
Perfect for: Signing a deal — and drinking to its success.
How’s the service? Excellent.
Who goes there? Preppy, cigar-smoking American executives in
pinstripes; middle-aged women on a girls’ night out.
What we think: Fantastic view, but without a ringside seat,
you can’t really see much at night.
Rating: 6 out of 10.
Details: Hilton Park Lane, (020-7493 8000, www.hilton.co.uk),
22 Park Lane, London W1.
