USP By far the best bit was our suite’s own private massage gazebo surrounded by ponds thick with lilies and overlooking the sea. The Earth Spa by Six Senses is based on a traditional Thai rural village and is made entirely from a mixture of clay-like mud mixed with rice husks and straw, forming circular domed buildings set in water.

AMBIENCE Whim catering par excellence - we had two butlers, three showers (one steam, two outdoors in walled tropical gardens), a sunken whirlpool bath in a lily pond and a wine cellar to go with the two mini-bars, plasma TVs and an extensive therapy menu.

EXPERIENCE I chose a gentle holistic massage, showered and got horizontal to get in the mood. Then I watched four Thai youths take almost 50 minutes to prepare my massage space. They brought in masses of fluffy white towels, baskets of essential oils, candles, incense, flowers, an extra sound system and smooth white pebbles which were arranged with protractor precision for good feng shui. I felt like Cleopatra for the day. I chose my own smells, toned down the incense, and asked for the music to be turned off (a bit too much xylophone). Afterwards, massaged into a stupor, I didn’t even have to move. I just waved goodbye to the therapist and nodded off to the sound of birdsong.

FOOD Many of the ingredients used in the specialty Skin Food treatments are grown at the Evason Hideaway. These include freshly harvested rice, coconut, avocado, papaya, lime, aloe vera, cucumber, lemongrass, ginger, candlenut and turmeric; they form the basis of a menu of balanced cuisine in the Living Room.

IN CROWD A-listers keen to keep their cellulite out of the paparazzi’s powerful lens.

WALLET WATCH Seven nights in a spa pool villa costs from £1,609pp, room only, based on two sharing, with Kuoni Travel (01306 747008; www.kuoni.co.uk). A range of treatments, including a 50-minute papaya body polish, start from about £30.

NEED TO KNOW The Evason Hideaway, Hua Hin, Thailand (www.sixsenses.com)

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