Stefan Gates
Enter our Snapshots of Summer photography competition

I’m visiting the Guo-li-zhuang restaurant, a specialist penis and testicle emporium that caters mainly to wealthy businessmen and Communist party officials (who, truth be told, are often one and the same).
It offers every conceivable John Thomas you could ever want, which probably isn’t very many. Nonetheless, the menu is both extensive and impressive.
The place looks like a smart kaiseki ryori (Japanese haute cuisine) formal restaurant, complete with underfloor stream, separate secluded dining rooms and hushed, discreet staff. I have come determined to avoid euphemisms - we’re making a current-affairs programme for the BBC - but I’ll admit the temptation is strong.
I ask a chef to show us the preparation of a penis first, so that I can get a feel for the process. He enters holding aloft an eye-wateringly large yak’s knob. It’s about 45cm long, but thin, so thin. It’s been boiled gently and - I can’t believe I’m writing this - peeled, except for a hunk of foreskin still clinging on to the end. He cuts the thing in half lengthways with a pair of scissors.
As he chops through the very tip of this impressive member, I feel an undeniable empathy twitch in my own penis and a bizarre feeling of nausea in my groin. (I didn’t think groins could experience nausea.) I can’t help yelping in sympathy.
He then uses a knife to make hundreds of little snips along the side of the penis and chops the strips into 5cm pieces. When these are dropped into boiling stock, they curl up into little flower shapes that are so incongruous, I can barely believe my eyes.
I ask the chef if he thinks it strange to deal exclusively in genitalia, but he shrugs and doesn’t know what to say. He’s just happy to have a good job, really. His friends don’t take the mickey, his parents are proud of him and he does what he’s told. Okay.
Less taciturn is the female manager of the place, who says that Chinese history is one of famine, poverty, drought and disaster, which is why the Chinese have become used to eating every part of the animal - they have to extract every edible morsel from the food they have.
I ask if this is good communist food, and she proudly says that most of her customers are male Communist party members. Their meal costs an average of two months’ wages for a dumpling-factory worker, and I ask how a conscientious Communist can be seen here (paying up to £250 for the rarer penises) when the average peasant is on the poverty line.
She holds her hands up in the air and tells me that they come for the virility benefits genital-eating offers. Apparently, you can go for hours after eating a good portion of penis.
We try the water-buffalo penis first, in thin shavings. It started long and thin, but someone has shredded this noble old chap on a mandolin. It has the texture of squid and tastes of the mild chilli stock it’s been poached in.
Search for a holiday
e.g. Villa in Tuscany
Win a luxury weekend to Newcastle and its neighbour Gateshead, find out more here
Risk, resilience and embracing new technology
Industry sectors news at a glance. Interactive heatmap, video and podcast
Discover the collective power of smart thinking. Submit a solution and be in with a chance to win a Flip MinoHD Camcorder
The inside track on current trends in the charity, not for profit and social enterprise sectors
Everything the Business Traveller needs to know to make a better trip
Make the most of the summer and enter our fabulous photographic competition, you could win a £5000 holiday
Corsica is an island of beauty and contrast, an ideal holiday destination
Enjoy further reading from Travel to Fashion, Business to Sport, discover more



Free luxury travel brochures from specialist tour operators. Find your perfect holiday
Worldwide holidays from Times Selects. View our e-brochure and check out our superb collection of escorted tours
Advertise your home to the best travel audience on Times Online and VacationRentalPeople.com
Shortcuts to help you find sections and articles
The clever way to lease a new car is with Car leasing made simple™
2009
42,945
2008
71,450
Car Insurance
Not Specified
MI6
UK-based
£60,000
The Environment Agency
Bristol
Up to £90K
Boots
Midlands
OTE £85k
Credit Protection Association
Nationwide Opportunities
Completely London
Luxury Condo's in Manhattan with NYC views
The best new homes in Wimbledon?
Nationwide
Save up to £1,000 per couple with Elite Vacations at the five-star Constance Lemuria Resort
and do the British Isles this Summer.
Save up to 60% with Oxford Hotels and Inns
Try our inspiring luxury holidays to the Indian Subcontinent and South East Asia.
Great offers available
8 fabulous Canadian cities ...you won’t find cheaper
Contact our advertising team for advertising and sponsorship in Times Online, The Times and The Sunday Times, or place your advertisement.
Times Online Services: Dating | Jobs | Property Search | Used Cars | Holidays | Births, Marriages, Deaths | Subscriptions | E-paper
News International associated websites: Globrix Property Search | Property Finder | Milkround
Copyright 2009 Times Newspapers Ltd.
This service is provided on Times Newspapers' standard Terms and Conditions. Please read our Privacy Policy.To inquire about a licence to reproduce material from Times Online, The Times or The Sunday Times, click here.This website is published by a member of the News International Group. News International Limited, 1 Virginia St, London E98 1XY, is the holding company for the News International group and is registered in England No 81701. VAT number GB 243 8054 69.
i think he meant that it was the only one served there with a bone in it.
Trish, Indianapolis, USA
Jane of Hangzhou, I don't think they mean the only on with a penile bone in existence but instead of that which they ate there. As Tom had said the vast majority of mammals do in fact have this bone; humans, horses, donkeys, rhinoceros, marsupials, rabbits, elephants and hyenas don't however.
Hunwi, Cork, Ireland
Isn't fish semen what they called "soft roe" on the original Iron Chef.
Goliano, Chicago, IL, USA
Let's clear up the back-and-forth about bones and penises. The bone is called the baculum, and it is common in MOST mammals. Fewer do not have a baculum than do. I remember as a kid fashioning home-made fishing hooks out of racoon baculum. Feel free to read Wikipedia for confirmation ( of what a baculum is, not my fishing hooks...)
Tom, College Station,
I am a chinese,I had never eat those thing.most pople around me are vegetarians.
Jane, hangzhou, china
You say that the dog is the only animal which has a bone in its penis, yet I have just finished a novel by Fred Vargas called This Night's Foul Work, which says that it's the cat which alone has this phenomenon.
Christopher Kelk, Toronto, CANADA
I am NOT going to risk going into a Chinese penis restaurant!
Have you ever seen those meat cleavers that the Chinese cooks use? Whack! Whack!! OMG... they make me literally shrivel up with fright!
"Mad dogs and Englishmen...go into penis restaurants!"
Garth Rex, Glendale Heights, USA
I want part II of this story. What did Mr. Gates do for the rest of the night... After leaving this restaurant. I feel sory for any female that crossed his path that night.
SH, Hong Kong,
Doubly, triply glad I'm a vegetarian.
JLTucker, Cleveland, OH
Well, do not only single out dogs simply because they can be pets. Actually human beings are cruel to other aninals too, like pigs, lambs etc. This happens all over the world.
Lianke, China,
Eating evey parts of the animal is the most environmental friendly way. It sure beats eating only the muscles and throw away the rest. With global warming and the carbon footprint of raising cattles etc, maybe it is about time we all start exploring alternative source of protein bandwagon with the same gusto as exploring wind power.
Kris, New York,
I'm fairly surprised nobody has pointed to the ingredients of the average hotdog as an example of stomach churning organ-usage. I'm sure most meat eating humans have, unwittingly or not, consumed penis, eyelid, testicle etc.
Mike Simpson, Prague, Czech Republic
The argument that people eat every part of the animal due to famine poverty etc is just weak. Other people living in harsh areas dont eat these things....Anyway what is the hardship now ? why are they eating it these days....? Chinese are hypocrites because they express distaste at other peoples ways and culture but this sort of thing even neanderthals wouldnt do it.
Dev, Perth, Australia
Fish semen is called milt and it is delicious fried on toast.
Bill, Vancouver, Canada
The bigest threat to the animal kingdom is the asian obsession with their erection. If someone told them that eating the eyeball of a puppy would give them a longer erection, they would gather up every cute puppuy dog for slaughter
jay, burlington, vt
We eat animals' feet, wings, ears, stomachs, and intestines, not only become traditionally people were starved or we think they are nutritious, but also because they are more tasty and have got more flavour than chicken breasts, etc. I never fight with the English when we eat birds together because I prefer thighs and wings, while the English people go for white meat, which I think is tasteless and dull. Have you noticed that feet, wings, ears, stomachs etc are more expensive in China?
As far as penis is concerned, how many percent of the Chinese population eat it and does it reflect the real Chinese's appetite? It is like sushi on a naked Japanese girl, how many Japanese people eat that?
Lily, Leeds, UK
I can assure you that this article is genuine. The writer has got it spot on. We, the Chinese eat everything on the animal; ears, feet/trotters, snouts, intestines, stomachs, tail and also penis because historically you either ate them or starved. And the Chinese have made some very decent dishes involving all of these parts and nearly all of the above can be found in the average dim-sum restaurant today.
The other part you have to consider is the old Chinese adage that whatever organ or body part you consume, improves the same organ in your body. This isn't as daft as it sounds. For instance when you boil stock with animal bones which the Chinese frequently do, you end up with a lot of calcium in the soup.
All this restaurant has done is put an up-market spin on this, so that well off patrons end up paying many-many times what street hawkers have been dishing out cheaply for years.
Mike, Hong Kong, China
bro there is other things to eat u noe!
sally, auckland nz,
Lily in Leeds. Of course this is true. China has a long and proud history (no pun intended...) of consuming all kinds of foods that increase the male libido. And, having lived in China for the past couple of years, I've been served everythings from chicken's stomach to yak penis so don't doubt the authenticity of this for one moment.
p.s. i wasn't a big fan of the chicken's stomachs...
stephen, china, china
This article does not give the name of the area where the restaurant lies though the restaurant's name is mentioned. Remember there are quite a lot of anti-Chinese people around.
Even if this story is true, the restaurant owner thought of this idea just for the sack of attracting customers to make money and I am sure not many people would like to try those dishes. I would vomit even if I were offered penis dishes free of charge. If you examine the photo in this article carefully, how many people or Chinese people have you seen apart from the writer and his guide? I think this restaurant is more attractive to foreigners than the local Chinese.
As far as I know, the majority of Chinese people eat the same meat as that in the western countries. In southern China, some people do eat snakes and dogs occasionally. I myself have tried these meat once and they tasted delicious, but this is not something often used. I suggest more western people go to visit China and see it with their own eye
Lily, Leeds, UK
As seen on the Paul Merton travel programme. Any mention of China has to be followed shortly after by this story until journalists grow up a bit
tee hee guess what they eat in China!!!
John Ledbury, Kings Lynn, England
Hysterically funny! There is a chef in Spain who has fish semen on the menu....!
cherry, london, uk
So, people are eating animals' penises. Goodness me! Hold the front page. Yawn. ZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Terence Stratham, Wombourne,
I am sorry to see the BBC allowing it's reporters to patronise an establishment contributing to the plight of endangered species just for a pointless report on something almost none of it's audience will want to partake of.
P D Cunningham, Camden, SC/USA