Most gay men adore spas – particularly those of us who have more than one set of hair straighteners and own a truck-load of Calvin Klein pants. What’s not to like about firm massages, lounging by the pool and hours of personal pampering?

So with that in mind I whisked my boyfriend Stuart away for a two-day mini-break at the gay-friendly Cottons Hotel and Spa, in Knutsford, Cheshire. Spa breaks for couples are all the rage yet few chase the pink-pampering pound. My gay friends tend to favour the chrome-and-steel metrosexual day spas springing up in cities. Cottons is for men and women but I chose it because it specialises in treatments tailored for men using the suitably butch sounding Australian Vitaman product range.

I didn’t feel like a queen despite my fluffy robe and girlie slippers. In the treatment room, Sheila, my therapist, had me derobe and lie face down on the table, which was covered in a heated, inflatable mat. With my undersides delightfully warmed, Sheila got to work on my scalp. The head treatment coaxed me into a dream-like state but I was gently reawakened by an invigorating back and shoulder massage, followed by a Vitaman muscle rub that worked almost like Deep Heat and was very relaxing.

I met Stuart back in the relaxation room for a debrief. His therapist was apparently younger than mine and, by the sounds of it, slightly more aggressive. At one point she even mounted the table to massage deep into his back tissue. It was the best massage he’d ever had. “For such a small woman she definitely went for it,” he told me in a hushed tone.

Ambience Traditional, muted decor and warm, friendly staff. The spa’s treatment rooms were segregated from the pool, steam room and sauna, which were open to hotel residents.

Experience For my hour-long massage session, the therapist used several Vitaman products, which were soothing and smelt a bit like aniseed. They contained wattle resin, which Aborigines use for natural pain-relief, grass lily, quandong kernel oil and kakadu plum. The Vitaman secret is strong doses of all these ingredients, required to penetrate deep into men's skin which is apparently 25 per cent thicker than women’s.

Food The usual range of herbal teas and mineral waters. The hotel’s restaurant was expensive and choice on healthy options was limited.

In-crowd Apart from us, it was mainly mums and daughters, thirty-something women getting facials and wedding guests.

Wallet watch We both had the Back and Scalp Reviver (£49 for 55 minutes). Short, 10-minute Turbo treatments for the back, foot or scalp are £18. Single rooms cost from £150 per night.

Need to know Cottons Hotel and Spa, Manchester Road, Knutsford, Cheshire (01565 650333, www.cottonshotel.com)

Time is money, darling

YOU HAVE . . . 3 HOURS AND £29

Thermae Bath Spa, Bath USP A spectacular roof-top pool. Ambience Britain’s coolest all-day spa is steeped in history and packed with places for couples to canoodle. Experience Aroma couples massage, Pevonia facials and chardonnay bath. Food Light lunches in smart café. In-crowd Romantics and tourists. Wallet watch From £19 for 2 hours. Need to know (01225 331234; www.thermaebathspa.com)

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