Will the Anglo-German beach war never end? British resentment of German tourists began in the 1960s when, thanks to the “economic miracle” in West Germany, they began to travel in large numbers.

Soon the British and the Germans were in direct competition for restricted hotel space, and the Germans with their strong currency won out.

Since then the unfunny beach towel cartoon has become a regular newspaper feature and has been analysed by German sociologists. A survey of German caricatures conducted by the Goethe Institute and the University of Osnabrück found that the cartoon beach towel exposed British insecurities.

The expansion of German industry – the purchase of Thomas Cook by the charter airline LTU in 1992 triggered a wave of German sunbed jokes – German unification and Germany’s reluctance to take part in military operations abroad have all made use of the beach towel cliché. One cartoon from 1991 shows a British ship en route to the Gulf, carrying crates of German aid for the war against Iraq: towels. A sailor tells his shipmate: “Apparently we simply get up early and lay them on the beach – the Germans say they’re wonderful for claiming territory.”

Mr Barnish’s complaint is exceptional. Most British tourists now seem happy to share their hotels with Germans. Because of the German love of litigation against travel operators, standards in Mediterranean package holiday hotels have risen and cockroaches are a rare sight. But a sense of guerrilla warfare still stalks the Spanish pools. A malevolent (almost certainly British) tourist smeared German beach towels with honey last season on the Costa del Sol, attractings wasps and other insects.

— Roger Boyes is the author of My Dear Krauts and How to be a Kraut, both bestsellers in Germany

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