Attend an evening with Andre Agassi

In a previous life I spent a bit of time on the World Bank’s gravy train. This enabled me to travel the world in some style, and on expenses. I had forgotten about this when I checked in to The Berkeley hotel in Wilton Place, Knightsbridge, but the receptionist clearly had not.
“Mr Wright,” she said. “Welcome back!”
It is little touches such as this that make The Berkeley the best address in London. Forget joining clubs, renting an apartment or buying your own place. When the staff treat you this well, why would you want to stay anywhere else? And it’s a reassuring thought that at any time during your stay Sienna Miller may be doing laps in the hotel’s small swimming pool.
There is one other advantage to the place. When the narrator of The Great Gatsby rented his place on East Egg on Long Island, he said that it came with the “consoling proximity of millionaires”. As I strolled out of The Berkeley on Saturday morning and headed towards Chelsea, I bumped into Roman Abramovich. It is even more consoling to have billionaires in the neighbourhood.
Trouble is, you almost need to be a billionaire to stay there. Breakfast is £26. A swim in Ms Miller’s pool is nine quid, even if you’re a guest. An orange juice is a fiver. And a simple supper of a couple of hamburgers and a bottle of decent burgundy came to more than £100. And that was only in the Caramel Room, not one of the snazzy restaurants such as the Boxwood Café or the Michelin-starred Pétrus. However, it’s a nice room with comfortable chairs and wood everywhere. In fact, staying at The Berkeley is a bit like spending the weekend in a large Bentley.
Of course, one can easily argue that if you can’t afford it you shouldn’t be staying at The Berkeley. However, there are certain things that can still be improved. Our room on the 8th floor was a little poky, and there was only one armchair so my wife was forced to sit on the floor. One of the waitresses in the breakfast room had terrible problems adding up the bill. Each time we rejected the amount, she came up with a different, larger figure. They are obviously not used to people checking the amounts. Eventually she did the decent thing and announced that coffee would be on her.
The concierge and doormen are peerless. So are the beds and the bathroom. In fact, the only thing that will give you a sleepless night at The Berkeley is the thought of the bill the next morning.
Bottom line: Rupert Wright booked his double room a month before he stayed and paid £210.38 room only. Dinner for two in the Caramel Room was £132.48.
Need to know: The Berkeley Hotel (020-7235 6000, www.the-berkeley.co.uk ) Wilton Place, Knightsbridge, London SW1.
Sampling the fare: Pricey, but good. We wondered whether the scrambled eggs and bacon had been topped with gold leaf, on account of the £26 price.
Access all areas: Yes. Wheelchair-friendly rooms; ramps to ease access in parts of the hotel with steps.
Room: 8 out of 10.
Food: 7 out of 10.
Service: 9 out of 10.
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