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It's easy for country house hotels to get it wrong: imposing façades and
hexagonal chimneys count for nothing if the bedrooms are small, the shower
curtains plastic and there are sachets of soap that you can open only with
your teeth.
Luckily, there is none of this at Gravetye Manor, an Elizabethan house half an
hour’s drive from Gatwick airport. Once you hit the crunching gravel drive
you escape the rigours of the jet age. You could have stumbled across a
remake of Upstairs Downstairs or found yourself in Mandalay on a
visit to Rebecca. The staff are welcoming, and fortunately there is no sign
of Mrs Danvers. However, the women do wear fetching black uniforms.
On my arrival I was told that I had been upgraded to a larger room. It was the
size of a squash court, with a comfortable bed and the television hidden
behind a screen so that I didn’t have to watch the England football team.
The leaded windows overlook magnificent gardens that were laid out by
Gravetye’s most famous owner, the gardening writer William Robinson. There
is even a croquet lawn, and a lake where you can fish for trout in the
summer. If I’d had more time, I would have liked to have wandered around and
lazed on one of the benches reading Byron’s poetry to someone else’s wife,
but it was time for dinner.
Down in the oak-lined drawing room I sat by the fire, enjoyed a whisky
softened with water from Gravetye’s own spring, and browsed the menu. There
seemed to be nothing on it that I didn’t want to eat. I settled for a
pumpkin soup and roast lamb. Then I moved on to more serious matters. The
wine list. It has more than 500 bins from all over the world, but I
particularly liked the selections from France. I picked out a Bandol, and
enjoyed a cracking good dinner. The cheese board was memorable. The chef
used to cook for King Hussein of Jordan, so I was half hoping for some
hoummos, but that apart, and the Americans at a nearby table who insisted on
talking to each other, the evening was perfect.
The next morning I would have liked to have stayed for the full English
breakfast, but I had an early morning flight to catch before the restaurant
opened. Even so they managed to bring me a good pot of tea, orange juice and
toast.
Assuming that the bank manager agrees, and I don’t miss the children, I think
I might go and live at Gravetye Manor.
Bottom line: Rupert Wright paid £215 for a double room, £7
for tea and toast, and £43 for dinner.
Need to know: Gravetye Manor (01342 810567, www.gravetyemanor.co.uk),
near East Grinstead, West Sussex.
Sampling the fare: Good grub. Nice veggies and fruit from the
kitchen garden.
Access all areas: No, though you can get to the restaurant
without using steps.
Best thing: Kennels for your labrador.
Worst thing: Being told it’s time to check out.
Room: 9 out of 10.
Food: 8 out of 10.
Service: 8 out of 10.
Value: 8 out of 10.
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